Money (And Clean Laundry) Make The World Go 'Round

Not that anyone would have noticed but the site was down last week. The JeffLand Treasury has been trying hard to keep the books balanced and make sure all of the bills get paid but, sometimes, one slips through the cracks. This time, it was the friendly folks over at 1 and 1 and they had to cut us off.

We’re back up and running now, obviously. A few payment method changes and we’re all friends again. What can I say? The “global economic crisis” has hit everyone.

Thinking of currency, I had a moment the other day with the Duke of Ginger that prompted me to ponder some of the more informal currency that is traded in JeffLand. One of those currencies is paired socks.

Yes, you read that right. Paired socks.

I don’t know what is going on down at the Royal Laundromat; I often see clean, unmatched socks just hanging around. Stragglers, I suppose. It isn’t for a lack of socks, that’s for sure. There can sometimes be random baskets of socks laying is obscure places. There seems to be a reluctance to spend the time to pair them and I think that, generally, the turnover of dirty socks to clean socks happens in batches rather than a few at a time which may aid in the backlog. Also, single unmatched socks get lost in the stacks of folded and undistributed laundry that piles up at the Laundromat.

Regardless of the reason, those bastards down at the Royal Laundry are lucky they’re unionized… otherwise I’d turf their asses so quickly it would make their heads spin. Let’s get real here… I wasn’t always King. I’ve paired a few socks in my time and, while I know it isn’t a glamorous or enjoyable job, it does have its place. Especially in a northern climate like this; you can’t leave the house without socks.

However, there is hope. Sock Reform is coming to JeffLand and I hope that this new initiative will solve many of the problems encountered by the old system. One of the key reforms is that when new socks are procured, they shall only be black in color. Preferably, they should be of the same type and weight as others previously bought but the main focus is that they are all black. Also, much like other currencies around the world, old socks (typically unmatchable ones or ones that have holes worn in them) are taken out of circulation. With these reforms put in place, I hope we can move forward to create a nation where paired socks are plentiful and the words, “I don’t have any clean socks” never have to be heard coming from a child’s mouth ever again.

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About El Jefe

He's been called a despot, a humanitarian, a philanthropist, a dumbass and "one sexy bitch". The bottom line is that it's all true... and it's a full-time gig.

Posted on January 13, 2010, in The Kingdom and tagged , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

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